Wealthy Blogger Linda Ikeji Finally Breaks Silence On Baby Daddy Jeremi... Says "He Treated Me With So Much Hate & Aggression I Had To cut Him Off Completely"
Popular Blogger Linda Ikeji reveals exclusive details of her love life with baby daddy Solaye Jeremi
Meet my son Jayce…and yes, Sholaye Jeremi is his dad!
Two
days before my 38th birthday on September 17th, I welcomed my first
child, my son, Jayce. I look at him and I wonder why I waited so long to
have a child. I’ve never known love like this. I literally have tears
in my eyes every time I look at him. I can’t believe he came out of me.
He is by far my greatest blessing and I’m looking forward to navigating
him through life!
Now
to the reason why you are reading this. I argued with myself for a long
time whether to put this out or not…and finally decided it was a story I
wanted to share. I've always been open about my life but I'm sharing
details about my personal life mostly because of the girls who look up
to me. The girls I have mentored, mentoring right now and plan to mentor
in the future. I’m very particular about our young girls and I have
personally tried over the years to be an example in some way; tried to
teach these girls how to fight for their dreams, how to live right and
do right and then I go and have a child out of wedlock and that must be a
little confusing to some of them and especially with so many untruthful
stuff out there about me. The most hilarious is that I had a child for a
married man. Lol. Here’s my answer to that! The married man that I will
sleep with has not yet been born. If he’s been born, he will die, be
buried, rise and die again before he will lay with me. I don’t do
married men. The father of my child is a single man and his name is
Sholaye Jeremi. To be honest, at some point I thought he was my final
bus stop but you know how life happens...lol. Unfortunately he and I are
a completely closed chapter. Sadly for our son Jayce, it’s the kind of
chapter that can’t ever be opened again.
One
of the things many people have asked me is how I met this man because
we don’t run in the same circle. Well, I met him 3 years ago at
Wheatbaker Restaurant in Ikoyi in December 2015 shortly after I moved to
my home in Banana Island, Ikoyi. It was a day after Christmas and I was
having dinner with friends when he walked in. He saw me and the rest is
history. He claimed at the time that he had never heard of me which was
seriously a turn-on for me because up until then I’d only been meeting
men who behaved like fans. At the time we met, I was 35 and he was 37
and I’d been single for nearly 4 years. I was definitely searching and I
fell in love almost immediately and so we became an item.
At
the time I met him he lived in a 3-bedroom flat at what used to be 5th
roundabout in Lekki after Mobil. I used to drive for almost two hours in
traffic from my house to go see him. Most of the time, I carried my
laptop to his home to enable me to work and at the same time spend the
whole day with him.
It
was a whirlwind romance. He was the funniest and most romantic guy I’d
met up until that point, so it was easy to fall in love and I truly
believed the feeling was mutual. A few weeks after we met, it seemed
like we were planning a future together. This man was already calling me
Linda Ikeji Jeremi and making all these plans but then just like that,
it was over between us. I went from waking up every morning to love text
messages from him to no more calls. I was just thanking God for finally
sending me my own man when all of a sudden we were no longer talking to
each other. Later he would tell me what scared him off. My public life.
He claims he’s a private business man and didn’t want the attention
being with me would bring to him and I told him I understood and we went
our separate ways. We tried to get back together in 2016 but it didn't
work out so much so we separated again but stayed in touch (mostly him
to be honest), stayed friends and that was how our back and forth
started.
By
mid-2017, we were both still single and we started seeing each other
again quietly. There were times it was very intense and we talked about a
future together, and there were times that I couldn’t figure out what
exactly I was doing with this guy. We were not suited for each other.
Totally different lifestyles. And there was the problem of my fame. I
walked away from this man a million times and he came after me a million
and one times. No matter how much I pushed him away, he kept coming
back and me, because I couldn’t find anyone else, I kept going back.
Lol. So I was basically going back to my ex because I couldn’t find
anyone else. *sigh*.
Then
I fell pregnant. It wasn’t planned, it just happened; though we talked
about having a child together just two months before I fell pregnant. He
said something about putting a billionaire baby inside me and I
remember jokingly telling him that I’m also a billionaire so our child
was going to be a billionaire on both side...and we laughed. But after I
fell pregnant, things became extremely weird between us. If I tried to
explain what happened, I wouldn’t be able to because it was confusing to
me. We went from talking about the pregnancy and being okay with it; he
even suggested I go to Dubai for my pre-natals as he didn’t trust
doctors in Nigeria, to literally not talking to each other anymore.
Around when I was about three months pregnant, he did come to see my
parents and actually became very cool with my dad. They were literally
exchanging Whatsapp messages every day. He later agreed to a traditional
wedding which he didn’t follow through and then he switched. He began
to treat me with so much hate and aggression that I and my family had to
cut him off completely.
To
be honest if anybody had told me when we met three years ago,
considering how deeply we cared for each other that I would fall
pregnant two years later and he would completely turn his back on me for
most part of my pregnancy, I never would have believed it but that’s
what happened. I had to draw strength from myself, my family and close
friends.
And
Jayce...oh my son Jayce, he was my biggest strength. It was almost as if
he knew his dad was acting up so he came through for his mum. He was
gentle with me when I was carrying him. I had an extremely easy
pregnancy. I pushed him out under 3 mins and was in the labour room for
less than 30 minutes. And then my snapback was amazing. Three weeks
later, it was almost as if I’d never been pregnant. Jayce was my soldier
when his dad turned his back.
But
still, I have absolutely no iota of regret meeting Sholaye. Gosh, have
you seen Jayce? How can I regret that? God doesn’t make mistakes. If you
believe that you’re always led by God like I believe then I have to
believe that God led me to this man for whatever reasons best known to
Him. I thought God sent him as my life partner but I guess He just used
him as a vessel for my greatest blessing. Now his part in my story is
over. I know when to put my hands up and surrender. That God brought
someone significant into your life doesn’t mean they are supposed to
follow you throughout your life’s journey. We should learn to know when
people’s part in our story is over. Don’t fight for closure, don’t ask
for explanations, don’t chase answers, just let them go and know that if
God meant for you to have them in your life, He would have given them
to you. Sometimes people just come to serve a purpose in your life and
are not meant to stay and there’s no point holding on to them. This one
is done and dusted. It’s just Jayce and I now moving forward and I know
life will be beautiful for us.
Being
a single mum wasn’t the dream I had for myself; I’d prayed for the kind
of happy home my parents built for us (they’ve been together for 40
years). Nothing is more important to me than family. For years I’d
hammered on how much I was looking forward to getting married, having
children and building my own family and I believed God was going to come
through for me on that one, but I have come to understand that we have
no control over what life throws at us no matter how much we plan, pray,
or work. And we also have no control over the actions of other people
towards us. One of the things I have learnt in my life’s journey is that
your idea of how life should go might be different from the way life
actually goes. It’s called Life Happening. Sometimes it unfolds into
something we never dreamed of but because we don’t recognize the route
we find ourselves on our journey through life, doesn’t mean God won’t
get us to our destination. Remember, an uncertain chapter doesn’t ruin
the whole book. Life will happen whether we are ready or not. All we can
do is keep our heads up and keep moving.
Family
and close friends told me I owed no one any explanation about the
circumstances that led to the birth of my son, but I knew without
writing this, I could never stand in front of the young girls who look
up to me and talk to them again. I could never go on my secondary school
tour and speak with these girls again about living right and doing
right. I would always feel like I have no moral right to do so. I went
to 15 secondary schools in 2017 and talking to those young
impressionable girls has been one of the highlights of my life. I
cancelled this year’s tour because I was pregnant and I haven’t made any
preparations for next year’s tour because I wanted to set things right
first.
I have so
many plans for young girls next year and in the coming years with the
Selfmade finance and mentorship projects with international
collaborations, so this was important for me to do, to explain myself to
the young girls who look up to me and feel disappointed that I got
pregnant and had a baby out of wedlock. For years, I have preached
decency, morality and uprightness and despite what happened to me, I
mean it from the bottom of my heart. That should be the only way to
live. That’s the only way I live. Don’t ever compromise your values.
With this, I was led by my heart and my clock ticking and even though I
have no regrets, I’m sorry if I let any of you ladies down by the
decision I made, and I hope you learn from my experience. I hope you do
better than I did. The ideal thing would be to find a man you love, who
loves you back and gives you stability, get married, have kids and raise
a family, not being a single mum or a baby mama. I was 37 years old at
the time I conceived and if I want to be honest, my age played a role in
me allowing myself to be pregnant out of wedlock. I don’t want to be
having kids in my 40s or struggling with fertility later in life. This
wasn’t the plan but like I said before, life happens. You just have to
find a way to make the best of what life throws at you. And so for any
young girl this means anything to, I am truly sorry. I am not sorry I
had Jayce, I’m just sorry I didn’t go about it the right way.
But
you know, despite this crazy love experience, I still believe in love
and I believe in happy endings and I can’t wait to one day, God willing,
have my fairy tale ending. The father of my child is the only man I’ve
given a chance to in 6 years. Lol. I swear. I’m not really a
relationship kind of girl. I’m more a career girl. I can go for years
without a man. I’m one of those women who don’t need a man to validate
their existence but biko, I’ve done the single life enough in the
past…lol… going forward I’m looking forward to giving someone else a
chance and try this love thing again. I was raised in a happy 2-parents’
home and that’s what I want for Jayce. So I hope I meet a great guy
soon until then I’m enjoying motherhood. It rocks! Life has never been
more beautiful!
I’d
also like to address a few other issues. Number one is this celibacy
issue. So many people have trolled me over it and I’d like to correct
the misunderstanding. I have never ever in my life said people shouldn’t
have sex before marriage. NEVER EVER have I said that. I have even
argued with quite a few people that it is not feasible in this day and
age. What I have always said and I maintain till today is; Do not ever
sleep with men for money because any woman with a brain and
determination can get her own money herself. And there’s nothing sweeter
than your own money. I am 38 years old and I recently bought a
N100million+ car; what the heck do you need to be sleeping with a man
for? For designer bags, first class tickets and luxury holidays? GTFOH
with sleeping with a man for rent money! You can give yourself all that
and more if you apply yourself, fight for your dream and work your butt
off. Men don’t have the exclusive right to create wealth; women can also
create wealth. Money is not male. Wealth is not male. Success is not
male. We women just need to believe in ourselves more and get off our
butts and stop relying on our looks and charm instead of our brain,
mind, will, and our God given talent/gift. We can be rich, we can be
successful, we can break barriers, do what was formerly termed
impossible, do what men can do, be CEOs of conglomerates and
billionaires without ever having to lie on our backs. Please ladies, we
are powerful beyond measure and can do anything and be anything we want
to be.
The other
thing I’ve always said is; do not sleep around with multiple men who
just use your body for their pleasure; that is; too many one night
stands, casual sex, many sex partners in a short period of time all in
the name of relationships. Your body deserves better. I feel sex should
only happen when you’re in a loving, committed relationship with someone
you love. I was celibate for many years until I met my son’s father and
fell in love. And instead of increasing my body count, I just went back
to the same eggplant…lol. My mistake was I should have walked away when
the relationship became a waste...lol... but then again, Jayce wouldn’t
be here today if I had. So really, there’s nothing that I have preached
that I didn’t practice. So you guys stop trolling me over this abeg!
Lol.
Thank you for reading and thank you for your understanding.
Love and kisses to you and yours
Hugs
Linda
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